Print Section Update – A Quiet Longing

#210 A Quiet Longing

Faint glow of day’s end
Heralding uncertain night
Clinging to mem’ry

The photo above is the latest addition to the Landscape print catalog. A full moon is seen rising above the azure waters of Sumilon island (off southern Cebu). The lingering light (and colors!) of an earlier sunset provides both a color and tonal contrast.

Advertisements

Exposing the Shadows – The First Step

Do you have photographs that depict despair, emptiness, and/or sadness?

A dear friend and patron asked me that question, and it made me pause.

I have been living with depression for over half of my life. Photography, like writing and music that came before it, is a light that I use to keep the darkness at bay. But I have never thought of turning that light from the dark outside to the one within.

I have always sought for hope in a world that I often view through a heavy fog. Even in the grips of a depressive episode, I manage to make pictures. But I have never made my demons the subject of these photographs.

Well, until now.

Exposing the Shadows is a yearlong personal project that I’ll be undertaking. It is a series where I let photography shed light on the recesses of my psyche. As I try to establish a connection between my inner dialogue and the pictures that I make.

Because I do have pictures that reflect on my struggles with the black dog. And I am now willing to share them. To let them speak of my reality, both the good and the bad.

These posts, over time, will become a visual journal of what it is for me to live with depression. It will be an honest account of days that often have no silver linings. I will not make attempts at being uplifting for the sake of a feel-good ending. But I will also not paint a landscape so bleak, that it is devoid of hope.

I am not out to become the poster child for artists living with depression. These aren’t the whys or the wherefores for the choices that I make. If you too live with depression, I am not out to offer sage advice. Or to tell you how best to cope.

I am just telling my story.

Bare – Julia

  1. What do you love about your body?

I love my eyes the most. I think they give people a glimpse of who I am.

It is through them that I see myself too.

  1. What are you most insecure of?

I am not really that fond of my upper arms. They never seem to lose the flab.

Before the shoot, I was quite apprehensive given that it was the first time I took part in something that was prolly a little mature – something out of the norm for me.

  1. After looking at your pictures, have they changed the way you look at yourself?

 

After the shoot, I was quite pleased with how the photos came out. Frankly, I didn’t think I could pull it off (Hahaha).

But, I now have the added confidence and the motivation to opt for a healthier lifestyle.

__________

*The Bare project was introduced here. You can read about its rationale here.

Bare – Queenie

  1. What do you love about your body?

I love my three B’s: brain, boobs and booty. I didn’t realize I had these assets growing up. Thanks to my mother who dressed me up in baggy pants and loose t-shirts. It was only when I had free rein of my fashion choices did I realize I had these features to flaunt. A properly-fitted bra and a flattering pair of jeans can do wonders.

But, it is my mind that I love the most. It keeps me grounded and prevents me from getting too attached to these time-bound assets.

  1. What are you most insecure of?

That would be another B: my belly. I have always had a supple belly growing up. When I crossed my 30’s, it started to grow. It doesn’t help that I am prone to depression and stress; my metabolism often gets out of whack!

I started throwing away the body-hugging tops and favored looser ones that hide my tummy. I said goodbye to two-piece swimsuits and said hello to rash guards not going swimming at all.

I feel embarrassed each time a sales lady says that that blouse won’t fit me. And what’s even worse is when my belly starts to compete with my chest!

  1. After looking at your pictures, have they changed the way you look at yourself?

 

The artist in me sees the sleek lines, supple curves, and the interplay of light and shadow. All this giving the body its form. I always view the human body, mine included, as a masterpiece of creation, regardless of its shape and size.

Looking at these pictures and remembering the experience I had affirms this belief.

__________

*The Bare project was introduced here. You can read about its rationale here.

Bare in Print – Nikki

It is a brave thing — to bare ones’ body, to acknowledge its beauty, and to reveal and accept its flaws.

And for this, I will always be grateful to the people who dared to take on the challenge of the Bare project. To show my gratitude, I am gifting each subject with a large print of their favorite photo from their respective shoots. This is not only a memento of how they looked at this point in their lives, but a ready reminder affirming and empowering them to love everything about their bodies and themselves.

To say that this post is late would be a gross understatement. I am still getting back to old routines and workflows. And I want to give each subject for the Bare their due, so without much ado here’s Nikki.
 
Nikki was a student of mine (back during my teaching days). This isn’t the first time that I’ve worked with her, nor will it be the last. She is a refreshing combination of spunk and smart. You can revisit her Bare feature here.

Bare – Abegail

  1. What do you love about your body?

I love and I am proud of my curves.

I love that they make me look sexy even when I’m not trying too hard. This isn’t to say that this is the only way to look sexy. I think feeling sexy has a lot to do with how you carry yourself. My curves make me want to carry myself more confidently.

But it wasn’t always like this though.

  1. What are you most insecure of?

When I said it wasn’t always like this, I used to hate my body because I was fat.

My thighs are not in proportion with my arms and my skin isn’t as smooth as I’d like it to be. When I was overweight, there was always that nagging feeling of wanting to change myself. It was horrible because I would feel guilty after eating a lot of food. As if that wasn’t enough, people didn’t think twice about pointing out the obvious. It was a really bad time for me.

Being fat strained me physically, mentally and emotionally.

  1. After looking at your pictures, have they changed the way you look at yourself?

 

Well, I still think that my thighs and skin could still use some help. But I think the photos have shown me that they can be seen in a positive light. They say that things are never as bad as you think they are. The pictures showed me just that.

In my head, I always think that I’m too fat, my skin looks really bad; all bad things really. The photos serve as a reminder that most of the negativity in what I consider to be bad exist only in my mind.

The experience taught me how looking good will come naturally once you feel good on the inside.

__________

*The Bare project was introduced here. You can read about its rationale here.

Shaking Things Up (The Print Catalog Reorganization)

#209 December Moon

The print catalog is now organized by category – ChemLoveArt, Landscape, and Street. The category title describes the content of each collection.

The photo above is the newest addition to the restructured catalog. I will announce future additions to the catalog through the blog. Make sure you follow or subscribe to get timely updates.

Would you like to request a larger print? Or a print of a photo that isn’t in the catalog? If you do, kindly send me a message through e-mail (jrlocaylocay@gmail.com) or through the form at the end of each collection.

The Late Luna (and the Limited Print Run)

One of the indicators that I’m going through depression is that I shoot less. I shot a bit at the start of the year and skipped two whole months before pushing myself to shoot again just this April. Despite the diminished drive, I was able to capture a few frames of the lunar eclipse that occurred last January. A little poignant in the way that I watched the moon slip into shadow when I was struggling to escape mine.

These photos are available as 6×9-inch prints for a limited time for those who are interested. These are limited because I’m not yet sure if I’m going to include this in my print catalog moving forward. The first image will be printed on glossy media and the latter on matte. Each signed print will go for PhP 1250 (about USD 25) and will come with its certificate of authenticity in a protective sleeve.

For inquiries and orders, send an email to jrlocaylocay@gmail.com or leave a comment below.

Print Clearance Sale (or How to Keep on Keeping On)

I have been noticeably absent from my blog for quite some time. I usually have an unplanned hiatus every now and then, but I suppose this is the longest I’ve been away. The past few months have been spent on dealing with my depression and doing some much-needed introspection.

I plan to make changes to my print catalog moving forward. Initial plans have been made, but they’re still a long ways off from being final. But I would very much like to start fresh, which is why I am holding a print clearance sale. The proceeds will not only help me pay the bills (as always), but more importantly, allow me to continue to create.

All of the prints  below can be acquired at 40% off their original price. Each 6×9-inch piece now goes for PhP 750 (about 15 USD). Only 1 edition of each print is available except where indicated. The sale will only be for the month of April (or until supply lasts).

#01 – Boats at Sea

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte (SOLD)

#02 – Catch of the Day

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (SOLD)

#07 – Sumilon Sandbar

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#08 – Mother and Child at the Beach

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Aurora Art White (SOLD)

#24 – Christmas Cornershop

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (RESERVED)

#25 – Beach Buddies

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (SOLD)

#26 – Yellow on Blue

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (SOLD)

#28 – The Morning Catch

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0 (RESERVED)

#30 – Daily Bread

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#35 – Pasko sa Pajo (I)

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0

#40 – The Sentinel

Editions: 2only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte

#41 – Outreach

Editions: 2only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#43 – To the Sea (I)

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (SOLD)

#44 – To the Sea (II)

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0

#46 – Sea of Stars

Editions: 2only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0 (SOLD)

#47 – By the Sea

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0 (SOLD)

#48 – The Summer of Life

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River UltraPro Satin 3.0 (SOLD)

#50 – Alapaap

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#52 – Summer Memories

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#55 – Mananagat

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River GreenPix Matte (SOLD)

#103 – pH Colors

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

#106 – #ChemLoveArt – Effervescence (Light)

Editions: 1 only; Paper: Red River Polar Matte

For all those interested, either write a comment below or send an e-mail to jrlocaylocay@gmail.com

A Time for Gratitude

20141123-jrl_wanderings_042
#24 Christmas Cornershop

Thank you…

if you’ve read and liked any of my posts.

if you’ve given me an encouraging comment or helpful critique.

if you’ve helped put my work in front of more people by sharing it on social media and in real life.

if you’ve collected any of my prints or licensed any of my photographs.

if you’ve commissioned me for a job because you genuinely like the work that I do, and not because I was the convenient option.

if you’ve trusted me enough to be part of my personal projects, even though it often made you feel vulnerable.

#37 Misa de Gallo

For helping me acquire gear, equipment and materials that are necessary for me to continue on this journey…

For offering me words of encouragement when I couldn’t see myself through to the next job or sale…

For believing in me, my skill, and determination…

For having been there since I took my first step on this journey…

Thank you.

And a merry Christmas to you and your loved ones!